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Hi Leo,
I occasionally get letters
and e-mails from guys who complain about the same thing you’re complaining
about: “Help! I’ve read your book three times and can’t figure
out which end is up.” Make no mistake about it, guys -- the answer to
ANY question about women and dating IS in the book. But let’s go
ahead, and if the answer isn’t there, I’ll apologize.
You
say have a good relationship with Holly. Leo, this should be a GREAT
relationship. A SPECTACULAR relationship. There shouldn’t be ANY ups and
downs. When you hook up with a babe, why would settle for something that’s
not incredible and exactly what you want? Like my Uncle Jethro Love says,
“You got 50 years for trouble once you get hitched!”
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You and Holly get together and talk on the phone HOW
often? Dude…one-third of “The System” is Challenge! You two are
so on top of each other all the time that there isn’t any room whatsoever
for Challenge. Excuse me a second while I go drop a Quaalude!
Trying
to make yourself a Challenge now is like closing the barn door after the bull
got out. You should have stayed a Challenge from the get-go. Right now
you’re more like a yo-yo. You play hardball with Holly and get her to come
at you, then when she does you go straight back to being a wimp because you
think she’s changed. You don’t see that it’s being a
consistent CHALLENGE that’s affecting her, putting her exactly
where you want her.
But as it is, Holly is getting really ticked off
at you. A big part of being a Challenge is HUMOR. I hope you’re handling
this situation with a good dose of humor, pal. Because when a girl’s
Interest Level is down to 51% to 55%, and it’s headed toward 49%,
you’re going to need all the gentle humor you can muster. Remember –
Jim Carrey, Vince Vaughn, Robin Williams, and Owen Wilson – they’re
the guys you want to channel when things get heavy.
When Holly
displays all this contradictory behavior, you have to disappear. Don’t
take her phone calls. Don’t return them. Once she starts dissing you by
screaming and yelling, you have to CUT IT OFF. You’re not dropping her,
but you’re going to disappear for a couple of weeks and see if it shakes
her up.
Let me get this straight. You’ve got heavy-duty
relationship problems and you’re arranging a group date? After you
own the girl, when everything is perfect, you can have the U.S. Navy over if
you want. But when you’re mired in difficulties the last thing you want is
an audience complicating things. With the kinds of stuff you’re battling,
you shouldn’t have invited Holly over at all. Or like my cousin Fast Eddie
Love says, “Better yet, invite all her friends and don’t invite
her.” That’s playing super-hardball!
But you’re up
against a woman displaying uncontrollable rage. Let me ask you a question, Leo.
Is a woman in the grip of an uncontrollable rage – when she’s
stomping on your ego out like a smoked-down cigarette – loving? And Holly
doesn’t show the least bit of restraint when she attacks you. She lets you
have it with both barrels. Like my cousin Brother Love down in Watts says,
“I’d hate to see what she’d do if she didn’t love
you!”
This behavior of Holly’s has a lot to say not just
about how low her Interest Level is, but also the way she does combat. Which
means that every time you have an argument with this banshee, this is what
you’re going to have to deal with. Like my cousin Sal “The Fish”
Love says, “Good luck, man. By the way, have you considered switching
girlfriends?”
By the time this debacle was over, you’d
endured 20 whole minutes of a vicious tongue-lashing. Worse, you hung around to
take the beating. I don’t know what it is with you guys. Like the Bottom
Line Factor says, “They give you the tiniest morsel of hope, then they
beat on you nonstop.” Amazing.
But you still think Holly will
come around. Leo, her Interest Level is nowhere near decent right now –
because it’s down in the 40s. What can you going to do with an Interest
Level that low except wait to get dumped? Her screaming and carrying on is part
of her bad attitude. And the worst part for you is that it’s completely
separate from the fact that she despises you. You’re on some la-la tangent
here if you think this situation is going to take a turn for the better. What
you need to do is get out of town. Let Holly chase you, then you’ll see if
there’s any real hope left.
You’re not here to make this
girl happy, buddy. You’re here to raise Interest Level. While
you’re trying to make Holly happy, her Interest Level is swirling around
the toilet bowl. Like the old Chinese proverb goes, “So why are you on
this road, grasshopper?” It’s obviously the wrong one. Are you
sure you have my book?
Leo, right now your Interest Level is 100%.
And you’re just grasping at straws. So forget about your emotions and
being bitter. Those are the last things Holly cares about. Do your homework and
study my book.
Remember, guys: until she wants to apologize, she
doesn’t know how to find you. |
